I sent leftover pizza to work with the hubster today, forgetting that he has a company lunch to attend. He just called and when I mentioned it, he laughed and said, Oh don’t worry about it. The pizza will keep. It’ll last for months. Years. It has a shelf life of a thousand years…no…ten thousand years. The stuff is like radioactive waste. And then we laughed because the thought was just so absurd.
The hubster’s sense of humor is always escalating like that. His jokes climb stairs, scale cliffs, then sprout wings and fly. He loves stretching farther and higher for the most ridiculous comparison he can find and, I admit, the more ludicrous it gets the harder I laugh.
Then, out of the blue, I remembered all the photographs I’ve seen on the internet recording the daily decomposition (or lack thereof) of a McDonald’s hamburger.
And all of a sudden I wondered: Will McDonald’s hamburgers eventually take over from radioactive waste as the new comic standard against which all decomp-resistant materials can be measured? Instead of It has the shelf life of radioactive waste will we say: It has the shelf life of a McDonald’s hamburger?
copyright Dia Osborn 2012